Our Debt Free Family

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Debt-Free Wedding Planning and Prepping for the Year Ahead

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debt-free wedding

Since my last personal update on the site, a lot has happened. First, we’ve announced to our friends and family we will be getting married this year (tentative November 2 date). Instead of eloping to Vegas, we decided to spend the money we would have on the trip and hold a ceremony here with everyone.

*Visibly Panics*

I’ve never dreamed of having a large wedding but, since announcing, I’ve gotten more excited by it day by day. But, of course, like everything with finances, it will be difficult. This is especially because we will be maintaining regular payments on all of our debt while putting together a completely debt-free wedding.

A Debt-Free Wedding

It is extremely important to both of us to not rack up any more debt planning a gathering for our family and friends. For this reason, we have vowed to pay cash for everything that has to do with the big day.

I’m thrilled about this and believe that if we buckle down on our spending we’ll be able to do this easily! Plus, we’ve got some awesome family and friends willing to help us make this dream come true. Here are a few things we are going to do to keep cost low.

  1. We are serving tacos. We both love tacos and they’ve grown in popularity in recent years. So, we will have a taco bar at our wedding. After looking at some catering places, we are expecting this will cost about $12.95 per person (much less than the usual $60+ we’ve been quoted elsewhere).
  2. Search for venues outside the city. Venues close to the city were priced at $6,000+ for a four-hour event. Once we looked outside the city, we found venues willing to rent their properties for two days for $2,100.
  3. Nixing the traditional cake. We will have a two-tier cake with cupcakes. This will cut the cost a bit but still give us the chance to get a photo of cutting our wedding cake.
  4. Make it kid-free. After some consideration, we decided to make our wedding a kid-free event. I found some tasteful language to depict that on the invites and (hopefully) our friends and family with children under 15 will be able to make arrangements.
  5. Skip the RSVPs. Many wedding sites (like Zola) will allow your guests to RSVP through your wedding website. This can save you $1+ per person on RSVPs. If some of your guest list isn’t very tech savvy, you can also offer them the option of calling you. Then you can log the RSVP in the site with the others.
  6. Wear a suit instead of a tux. Tuxedos rentals, or buying a tux, can be extremely expensive. Consider buying (or renting) a nice suit instead.
  7. Keep your wedding party small. We have limited our wedding party to four people: a maid of honor, one bridesmaid, a best man, and one groomsman. This will help keep wedding gift costs low and (for us) cuts down on the stress of planning.
  8. DIY your decorations. Pinterest is going to be your best friend if you are going to DIY your wedding. You can search different color combinations and theme ideas. Then grab the members of your wedding party and get to making some decor!
  9. Utilize the skills of family and friends. If you have family members that do photography, DJ, or plan weddings, don’t be afraid to ask them about helping at your wedding. Of course, don’t expect them to work for free, but they are likely to offer a bit of a discount.
  10. Take advantage of free services. There are tons of wedding planning websites and apps out there that will help you plan your event for free. Take advantage of these sites and any other freebies you can while you’re engaged.

Lastly, don’t panic. As I may have mentioned earlier in this blog post, I panicked a little when we first decided to have an actual wedding. However, the key to keeping things under control and within budget is to stay calm and think about your options. As we’ve been comparing prices of venues and different caterers, we haven’t given any answers or deposits right away. Instead, we take a moment to look at the budget as a whole and go from there.

Wedding Gift Plan

Of course, we are going to have a registry and will absolutely love any gifts we receive from our loved ones. We are also hoping to be gifted the best present of all: money. Any cash we receive for the wedding we’ve decided will go towards paying off our current debts. We will also start a small “honeymoon” fund so we’re able to take a trip later in 2020.

Overall, I’m beyond excited to plan this wedding and share it with you all. I also can’t wait to share how I’m able to pull off this debt-free wedding and share any tips/tricks I learn on the way. Lastly, I can’t wait to embark on this journey with my other half.

First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes financial freedom.

Readers, did you go into debt celebrating your marriage? How long did it take you to pay off?

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Our First Thanksgiving

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thanksgiving budget

My last personal update had a ton of good news and it seems like that isn’t going to stop any time soon. In fact, we have some even better news!

Debt Payoff Progress

We paid a total of $391 on our credit cards this month (the first payment in a while). It felt so good to be getting back on top of each of our payments. We’re also happily saving up our $1,000 emergency fund. Once that is in place, we will have quite a bit more cash to snowball our debt. We are half way to our savings goal currently.

On top of that, we have a family first…

Our First Thanksgiving

My other half and I have had two Thanksgivings together (this will be our third). However, we haven’t ever hosted Thanksgiving. Our first holiday together, we visited with his family in Tennessee, and last year we stayed home and had a meal with just the two of us. This year we will be hosting our family!

This is huge for a few reasons.

First, I am happy we have the ability to host our family this year. We aren’t scraping by so badly we can’t spare $40 for a meal. This has given me some additional optimism about our current financial situation.

Second, it is absolutely a big deal to have the family here, in our home, and cook for them and have quality time. We’ve not had the entire crew here before.

Lastly, we have a budget and we’ve managed to stick to it! Here’s how…

Thanksgiving Budget

Like I said, we’ve managed to keep the entire meal under $40. Everything costed $36.89 to be exact. It hasn’t added any additional cost either!

We scoped out the different sales on turkeys and picked a 15-lb bird up for $4.10. The promotion required you to purchase $35 in groceries to get the $0.27 per pound price, so we just purchased our week’s worth of groceries and got the turkey at a decent price.

Everything else, we’ve picked up at Aldi. Because I had some marked down meat stored away, the “extra” cost of the Thanksgiving fixings was offset by having backup meals at home already. So, we didn’t go over our $50/week grocery budget when we got everything else either.

So, essentially, Thanksgiving isn’t going to cost us any extra this year! We are looking forward to a nice Thanksgiving with family in OUR home (without even altering our budget). How awesome is that?!

Readers, what do you have planned for Thanksgiving this year? 

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How to Handle Financial Stress in a Relationship

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Handling financial stress with a loved one, in many ways, is far better than suffering through it alone. However, stressing out about money can have a heavy impact on a relationship, whether it be romantic or platonic. So, how do you go about handling financial stress without adding stress to your relationship? 

There’s no 1-2-3 answer to this really. In many cases, the dynamic of the relationship will determine how financial stress is handled. However, there are some steps you can take to ease the stress on your relationship and place it where it belongs: on fixing your finances.

How to Deal With Financial Stress in a Relationship

My significant other and I have been living together for about a year and a half. Up until recently though, we were pretty strapped financially. It took a lot of discipline and hard work. We paid off debts, saved money, and made things happen quickly. One of the main contributors to our success in doing so was not allowing the financial stress to damage our relationship. Here’s how we did it:

  1. Be open and honest about money. One key step in our success to overcoming our financial stress was communication, and it will be on your journey as well. If you are sharing finances with this person, and plan to do so the rest of your life, you can’t be afraid to talk to them about it. A huge thing for us and many other couples is being able to find a tool that we could use to monitor all of the finances in the house. We did this by sharing a Mint budgeting account. We added all of our accounts and reminded one another of due dates, savings goals, and had a good idea of where we were financially at all times.
  2. Talk about areas you messed up and discuss your losses. Before we got to that great place where we were communicating about our finances well, we messed up. A lot. Don’t be afraid to admit when you’ve messed up, but also work with your partner on ways to prevent it from happening again. Talking about where you messed up and how it happened can prevent financial stress down the road. For instance, we went over budget at Christmas time and, subsequently, had a really tight budget at the beginning of the year. We discussed having additional savings this year for Christmas (because we both love the holiday). Discussing it took the stress out of the relationship and placed it back on the finances like it should be.
  3. Always appreciate the little things. When you are broke or seriously working on your finances, you don’t have money to spend on spoiling your significant other, and that sucks. You can still do a lot of little things that will make a world of difference though. When dealing with financial stress in a relationship, focusing on the little things can make-or-break it. While we were experiencing hard times, my other half brought home $1 coffee mugs (I love coffee), or he would bring home my favorite snack. Although these things didn’t cost much, they meant a lot.

Don’t Be Afraid to Get Help

Whether it is relationship counseling or financial counseling, always remember that reaching out for help is a possibility. Don’t be afraid to reach out to a financial advisor or relationship counselor to help you navigate these tough times. There are many affordable counseling services available.

Dealing with financial stress in a relationship can be tough but as long as you keep communication open, work together, and reach out for help when you need it, you and your partner will be on your way to financial success in no time!

Read about how to maintain your financial momentum. 

How Lauren Greutman, The Recovering Spender, Paid Off $40,000 of Debt

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Lauren Greutman and her husband, Mark, hit rock bottom in their finances a few years ago when they found themselves underwater in their mortgage, $42,000 in debt, and running a $1,000 deficit in their budget each month.

Fast forward a few years, and Lauren and Mark are now debt-free and run her popular frugal living site that helps millions of people, LaurenGreutman.com, formerly IamTHATLady.com.

I am so honored to be joined by Lauren in today’s interview to have her share her story and introduce her brand new book, The Recovering Spender: How to Live a Happy, Fulfilled, Debt-Free Life

Lauren is a wife, mom of four and a recovering spender. If her name sounds familiar, you may have seen her on TV as a frequent guest on The TODAY Show, Good Morning America, Nightline, The Dr. Oz Show, Rachael Ray, and more.

In this interview, Lauren shares:

  • How she and her husband, Mark, dug themselves out of $42,000 of debt in four years
  • What she did to cut her family’s grocery spending from $1,000 per month to $200 (Say what?!)
  • Her advice for those wanting to start a blog to bring in extra income and the great opportunities her’s has brought to her family.
  • What her brand new book, The Recovering Spender, is all about and who will benefit from reading it
  • What to do if you’re a Saver married to a Spender


I love this interview with Lauren! She has such an inspiring story of how she turned her life around from being a compulsive shopper to getting out of debt and now helping millions of others do the same.

Thanks again to Lauren for sharing her debt-free journey and her book with us!

[bctt tweet=”How @LaurenGreutman, #TheRecoveringSpender, Paid Off $40,000 of Debt” username=”MonicaRLouie”]

Lauren’s brand new book, The Recovering Spender: How to Live a Happy, Fulfilled, Debt-Free Life, is available in bookstores and online wherever books are sold.

You can learn more about Lauren at LaurenGreutman.com and find out more about her book at TheRecoveringSpender.com.

Now I’d love to hear about you!

What did you learn from Lauren’s story? Are you a Spender in need of recovery, or do you know someone who is? Please share in the comments below.

Have you joined our free community yet?

Join me in our private Facebook group called Your Debt Freedom Family, where we’ve got an awesome community of people who are kicking debt to the curb so they can break free and live life on their terms.

Click here to join the fun!

I’d love to see you there!

Keep moving forward toward your goals. You really can live the life you dream about!

Help! My Spouse Spends Too Much!

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What do I do when my spouse spends too much?

How do I keep my spouse on track?

I hear these questions all the time.

If you’re married or in a committed relationship, then you know that there are a lot of complexities involved when two lives join together.

Your two paths must move in the same direction with similar values, lifestyles, and goals for your future.

While all of your interests don’t need to be exactly the same, the direction you’re both heading in life must follow a similar trajectory.

Of course, there are always exceptions to every rule, but most long-term relationships can’t foresee a future together if one person wants to live in the hustle and bustle of New York City while the other person has their heart set on raising a family in the quiet plains of Montana.

As is the case if you want to live a life of debt freedom and your partner wants to continue living above their means, relying on debt to fund their lifestyle. Those two worlds are not aligned.

Being out of alignment with your spouse in such a huge area of life as financial goals can create a lot of tension, to say the least.

That’s why fighting about money is the top predictor of divorce.

Here are four strategies that you can use if you’re completely committed to kicking debt to the curb, but your spouse is sabotaging any progress you make by spending whatever he wants whenever he wants.

1. Make sure that you’re on the same page.

If you and your spouse haven’t agreed on your current financial goals, then review my article on how to get your spouse on board. Follow those steps to come to an agreement on where your financial life is headed.

2. Make sure that you’re giving him a chance to provide input.

Because I love numbers and spreadsheets, my husband is more than willing to let me run with creating our budget and then tell him how much we have to spend on things.
But he needs to have some ownership of the process too.So each month when I create our budget, I always show him the numbers that I came up with and explain any areas that are different from the previous month. I ask him for his input on what those amounts should be and explain how I came up with the numbers I chose. I always ask if he agrees, and since we’ve been doing this for so long, a lot of times, he does, but there are still times that he changes the numbers.And that is perfectly okay.

Instead of arguing my reasoning further, I agree to his numbers because I WANT him to be part of the process. I don’t want him to think his opinion doesn’t matter because I know that having him share ownership of the budget is more important than a $10 or $20 discrepancy in a spending category.

3. Make sure that you both have spending money built into your budget, and of course, that you AGREE on those amounts.

Whether you come up with a weekly, monthly, or an annual amount, make sure that you both explicitly agree to those amounts AND that you agree on what comes OUT of those amounts.For example, our spending money is used for when we want to buy ourselves something that isn’t included in other categories of the budget like a new gadget for my husband or a mani/pedi for me. Oftentimes, it’s our coffee or lunch money when we’re out by ourselves.I’ve heard time and time again from moms that they often use their spending money to buy things for their kids or someone else. So if you find that you’re using your spending money to buy things for someone else, then consider whether those purchases should be included in another category in your budget, such as gifts. For us, anything we purchase for someone else (even our kids) comes out of our gifts budget

4. Set up a reward system to keep you and your partner on track.

For example, I spoke with a woman whose husband would occasionally buy expensive sports equipment, even though it wasn’t in their budget.He worked hard for his money, and they both felt he “deserved” it, but it was throwing their plan to become debt-free in a few years off track, and it was causing her to have growing resentment because she was doing a better job of sticking to the plan and avoiding “splurges.”I suggested that she have a conversation with her husband about their common goal to become debt-free and set up a reward system. They could add a savings category to their budget for her husband’s sports equipment and add to it each month.

Or they could agree that once they paid off their next debt or reached their next milestone on their journey, he could buy his next piece of sports equipment then. I also suggested that she have some sort of reward at each milestone, too.

Doing so will keep them both moving forward toward their goals and satisfied that they’re making a point to enjoy their money, as well.

She’ll have peace of mind that they’re making progress, and he’ll no longer be sabotaging their hard work.

[bctt tweet=”Set up a reward system to keep you and your partner on track with your #budget.” username=”MonicaRLouie”]

If you follow these strategies, and your spouse is still spending too much, then review your budget categories and make sure the amounts are realistic.

Even if you both agree on the amounts, you might be trying to be too stringent. It’s better to loosen up a bit on the numbers and extend your payoff date by a few months than to get discouraged and give up entirely.

I truly believe that working together on your goal of becoming debt-free will bring you and your spouse closer and make your marriage stronger. I’ve seen it happen in my marriage, and I’ve heard the same from my clients.

Now I’d love to hear about you!

Have you experienced one partner in your relationship spending too much? How did you deal with it? What advice do you have for those in this situation? Please share in the comments below.

Have you joined our free private community on Facebook yet?

I invite you to join me in our private Facebook group called Your Debt Freedom Family, where we share more tips like this. We’ve got a fantastic community of people who are kicking debt to the curb so they can break free and live life on their terms.

Click here to join the fun!

We’d love to see you there!

Keep moving forward toward your goals. You really can live the life you dream about!

How a Family of 7 Paid Off $137,000 of Debt in 4 Years

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Do you feel like you’ll never get out from under your pile of debt?

If so, you need to read this inspiring story from the Miller family.

As their family grew from five mouths to feed to seven and with a wage of no more than $14.50 per hour, Ella and Lavern Miller paid off $137,000 of debt in four years!

Read on to hear from Ella Miller herself how they paid off so much debt in such a relatively short time.

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