11 Annoying Greetings That Immediately Turn People Off When You First Meet Them

First impressions can open doors—or slam them shut. Whether you’re at a neighborhood BBQ, a volunteer event, or just chatting with someone new at your grandkid’s school, how you greet people sets the tone for the entire interaction. And let’s be honest: some greetings don’t just fall flat—they crash and burn.

For baby boomers who’ve spent a lifetime building relationships in work, family, and community, there’s wisdom in knowing which phrases might unintentionally put people off. Sometimes it’s not what you say but how you say it. Other times, it’s a well-meaning comment that hits all the wrong notes.

So before you start another conversation that fizzles out before it begins, here are 11 greetings that annoy people instantly—and smarter, friendlier alternatives to use instead.

1. “You Look Tired!”

This might sound caring, but it’s often received as a subtle dig. Translation: “You don’t look good.” No one wants to be reminded they seem exhausted, especially when meeting someone new. Instead, start with something upbeat: “It’s great to see you!” or “How’s your day going?” That’s more likely to lead to a warm exchange—not self-conscious squirming.

2. “We’ve Met Before, Haven’t We?”

Ah, the awkward memory test. This question can make people feel uncomfortable or embarrassed if they don’t remember you. It can also make you seem unsure or self-important. A better approach? Take the lead and reintroduce yourself: “Hi, I’m Donna—we met at the fundraiser last fall.” That way, you smooth over any forgetfulness with grace.

3. “What Do You Do?”

This used to be a go-to icebreaker, but it’s starting to wear thin—especially in retirement communities or mixed-age social groups. Many people don’t want to be defined by their job, especially if they’re retired or between roles. Try asking something more inviting like, “So what’s been keeping you busy lately?” or “What kind of things do you enjoy doing?”

4. “Wow, You’re Shorter/Taller Than I Thought!”

Commenting on someone’s height or body right out of the gate can be jarring. Even if you mean it as a lighthearted observation, it can come off as rude or invasive. Physical attributes are rarely a good topic for a first-time greeting. Keep your opener focused on who they are, not what they look like.

5. “How Old Are You?”

Unless you’re filling out paperwork at the doctor’s office, this is not the kind of question people want to hear—especially from someone they’ve just met. Age can be a sensitive subject, and asking outright can come across as intrusive or inappropriate. Let personal details like age come out naturally, if they come up at all.

6. “You Haven’t Changed a Bit!”

While this may be intended as a compliment, it often rings hollow—particularly if it’s been 10 or 20 years since you last saw the person. It can also backfire by reminding someone of how much has changed, physically or otherwise. A better alternative: “It’s so great to see you again—it’s been too long!”

7. “Nice to Meet You… I Think?”

This kind of half-hearted greeting sounds uncertain and even a little snarky. It can make the other person question whether you actually want to be talking to them. Instead, just commit. A simple “Nice to meet you!” delivered with a smile is friendly and clear—no winking disclaimers needed.

8. “You’re Late!”

Unless you’re hosting a time-sensitive event or leading a meeting, there’s really no need to point out someone’s tardiness in your first sentence. Life happens—traffic, kids, unexpected delays. Leading with a jab about their timing sets a negative tone. Try “Glad you’re here!” or “So nice to see you!” instead.

9. “Do You Remember Me?”

This is another one that can cause unnecessary pressure. It puts people on the spot and makes them feel bad if they don’t recall who you are. Rather than turn the greeting into a memory challenge, make it easy for them: “Hi, I’m Carl—we met at Sarah’s retirement party.” That friendly nudge helps avoid awkward pauses.

10. “You’re So Much… (Insert Comment Here)”

Whether it’s “thinner,” “grayer,” or “more outgoing,” starting a conversation with a comparison can feel judgmental—even if you mean well. It draws attention to how someone has changed and can make them feel self-conscious. If you want to give a compliment, keep it simple and kind: “You look great!” or “You’ve got such great energy today.”

11. “What’s Wrong?”

This question, though often asked out of concern, can come across as accusatory or presumptive. If the person’s just having a low-key moment or deep in thought, it might make them feel scrutinized. A better approach? Greet them warmly: “Hey there! Everything okay today?” That gives them room to share if something is wrong—or just say hi and move on.

Final Thoughts

The way we greet others says more about us than we often realize. A good greeting doesn’t need to be clever or complicated—it just needs to be genuine. As a baby boomer, you’ve likely had thousands of introductions in your lifetime. And now, more than ever, those first few seconds can set the tone for meaningful conversations, new friendships, and positive connections across generations.

Avoiding these 11 annoying greetings isn’t about being perfect—it’s about being aware. A little thoughtfulness goes a long way. Swap the awkward openers for simple, sincere words like “Nice to meet you,” or “So glad you’re here.” Add a smile, a warm tone, and eye contact, and you’re already winning.

Because at the end of the day, people won’t always remember exactly what you said—but they’ll always remember how you made them feel.