8 “Rude” Habits That Boomers Cannot Stand (But Everyone Else Accepts Now)

If you have ever shaken your head at someone glued to their phone during dinner or wondered why nobody writes thank-you notes anymore, you are not alone. Many baby boomers grew up with a clear rulebook for what was considered polite and respectful. A firm handshake, a phone call instead of a quick message, and showing up at a neighbor’s door with a pie were signs of good manners.

But times have changed. What feels rude to many boomers is often considered completely normal by younger generations. Social norms evolve with technology, culture, and lifestyle shifts. The tricky part? What once signaled respect can now be seen as intrusive, inefficient, or even outdated.

This does not mean boomers are wrong. In fact, their perspective is rooted in values like connection, thoughtfulness, and courtesy—qualities that will always matter. Still, understanding how expectations have shifted can help bridge the gap between generations and make interactions smoother and less frustrating.

So let’s look at eight habits that boomers often view as rude but that most people today accept as the new normal. Some might make you laugh, others may make you nod in agreement, but all highlight just how much manners have evolved.

1. Texting Instead of Calling

Boomers often see phone calls as the most respectful way to connect. Hearing someone’s voice feels warm, personal, and genuine. But for younger generations, a quick text is the modern equivalent of knocking politely before entering a room. It avoids interrupting, gives the other person time to respond when convenient, and often feels more efficient. While a call may seem more courteous, texting is not about being dismissive. It is about balancing connection with respect for time. Think of it as the new version of good manners, just delivered in shorter sentences.

2. Showing Up Unannounced

Dropping by a friend’s house used to be considered neighborly and thoughtful. A surprise visit with muffins or coffee was a way to show you cared. Today, however, an unannounced knock on the door can make people scramble to tidy up, hide laundry piles, or pretend they are not home. Many people view their homes as private spaces that require a little heads-up before visitors arrive. While spontaneity still has its charm, the modern version of courtesy is sending a quick text or call first to ask, “Is now a good time to stop by?” That small gesture respects both old traditions and new boundaries.

3. Commenting on Personal Appearance

In the past, comments about someone’s looks were often seen as a form of concern or kindness. Complimenting weight loss, telling someone they looked tired, or reminding them to smile were not meant to offend. But today, those comments often feel invasive or even judgmental. Younger generations place a stronger value on respecting personal boundaries and avoiding assumptions about how someone should look. Instead of pointing out appearance, a safer compliment might be about someone’s talents, ideas, or even their outfit choice. The goal is the same—making people feel seen and appreciated—but in a way that feels respectful by today’s standards.

4. Overusing “Reply All” in Emails

When email first became common, hitting “Reply All” was practical. It made sure everyone stayed in the loop. For boomers who value thorough communication, copying the entire group feels efficient and polite. But today, inbox overload is a real problem, and unnecessary mass replies are often viewed as inconsiderate. Younger workers appreciate concise communication and only want to be included if the message directly applies to them. A good rule of thumb is this: before you hit “Reply All,” ask yourself, “Does everyone really need to see this, or can it go to just one or two people?” Being selective can make you appear more professional and respectful of others’ time.

5. Speaking Loudly at Airports or on Speakerphone

Public spaces today are shared spaces, and many people value quiet. Yet it is still common to see boomers speaking loudly on the phone or playing videos on speaker mode in airports, cafes, or waiting rooms. Often, it is not intentional—it simply comes from a time when phones were not so sensitive to volume or when fewer people were carrying around portable entertainment. But in today’s world, headphones and low voices are the new etiquette. Keeping conversations private and entertainment quiet helps everyone enjoy a little peace, especially in crowded or stressful environments.

6. “Boomerasking”: Asking Questions Just to Talk About Yourself

Here is a habit that has even been given a nickname: “boomerasking.” It describes when someone asks a question not out of genuine curiosity, but simply to turn the conversation back to themselves. For example, “How is your trip?” followed quickly by a story about their own vacation. While boomers often see this as a way to connect through shared experiences, it can come across as self-centered to younger generations. The fix is simple: ask, listen, and then ask a follow-up question before sharing your own story. True listening is timeless, and it never goes out of style.

7. Handwritten Thank-You Notes Only

Boomers were raised to believe a handwritten thank-you note was the gold standard of gratitude. It showed effort, thoughtfulness, and sincerity. While these notes are still appreciated, younger generations often see them as unnecessary or even inconvenient. A heartfelt text, email, or even a quick voice message can feel just as meaningful in today’s fast-paced world. The important part is expressing thanks in a timely and genuine way. If you love writing notes, by all means continue—but do not be surprised if your grandkids send a thoughtful text instead of stationery. It is not laziness, it is simply the evolution of communication.

8. Boarding Planes Slowly and Blocking Aisles

Air travel today is a race against the clock. Security lines are long, boarding groups move quickly, and people are often impatient. Boomers who take their time stowing luggage or linger in the aisle may not mean to cause a holdup, but younger travelers often see it as inconsiderate. The truth is, airline systems have created a rush that was not there in the past. A little preparation—knowing where your boarding pass is, packing lighter, or letting others pass if you need more time—can ease the tension for everyone. Sometimes modern politeness is less about speed and more about being aware of those around you.

Final Thoughts

At the heart of all these so-called “rude” habits is one simple truth: manners are not fixed, they evolve with time. What felt polite in 1975 might feel awkward in 2025, and what seems perfectly normal today may look outdated to the next generation. None of this means one group is right and the other is wrong. It simply reflects the way technology, culture, and lifestyle shape our expectations.

For boomers, the challenge is to balance the values they hold dear—kindness, respect, and personal connection—with an openness to how those values are expressed today. Whether that means texting instead of calling, keeping the volume down in public, or accepting a thank-you by email, it is about focusing on the intent, not the method.

The good news is that good manners, no matter how they change, always come back to empathy. Listening with care, respecting boundaries, and being mindful of others never go out of style. Boomers have spent a lifetime modeling courtesy. By blending those traditional values with an awareness of today’s norms, they can continue to set the tone for what true respect looks like—across every generation.